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Susan Casey's avatar

Thank you for providing a framework of understanding based on examples, evidence and environments. Your outlined strategies consistently offer practical application. Always a helpful read for personal reflection and personal application. Blessings

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Ellen Hendriksen's avatar

Aw, you're so welcome, Susan. Thanks for your kind words.

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Chih-Han Hsu's avatar

thanks for this great reminder!

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Celia Knapp's avatar

Yes! Such an important and rarely-heard message. I'm reading a great memoir ("Acceptance" by Emi Nietfeld) that is all about the author's experiences being diagnosed with mental "disorders" as a child, when she was essentially having reasonable reactions to an abusive and chaotic situation. As soon as her environment changed, she felt better. It also reminds me of Lena Dunham's essay about how she thought she was an anxious mess her whole life and really allowed that to define her self-perception. Same thing — when she moved out of NYC, the anxiety evaporated.

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Ellen Hendriksen's avatar

Yes, I think the closest term the profession has for this is "identified patient," which is the family member who gets labeled as problematic within a larger dysfunctional family, but think it's not quite the same thing. We need a new term!

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Darby Saxbe's avatar

I love this formulation of anxiety as a message that the environment might be amiss - something our field often ignores given the individual focus of psychotherapy. However, how do we handle more existential anxiety about, say, the current political climate? Follow-up column?

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Ellen Hendriksen's avatar

Oy yoy yoy--existential anxiety, especially about the present political climate, is a biggie. I think it depends on our goals, values, identity, and risk. I will marinate--I predict the answer will be very wide-ranging.

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Maureen Wiley's avatar

This was a great read! I wonder if you might write a follow-up on creating psychological safety in various arenas. I am missing a sense of psychological safety at work. I had a traumatic experience of betrayal and personal attack on my character in my first year working at my job, and I still don't really trust almost everyone I work with to not do something like that again.

Also, lots of smaller incidents have occurred at work that trigger my feelings from childhood where I was punished for not knowing something or making mistakes (or even just having strong emotions). I feel hyper-vigilant at work because of how often people respond to misunderstanding or normal everyday conflict with dysregulated emotions (verbal attacks, accusations, etc.)

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Ellen Hendriksen's avatar

I'm so sorry you experienced all that! Workplace trauma is coming up more and more with my clients, so it's definitely not just you. It's understandable that you don't trust it not to happen again. I'm definitely still in the learning stages myself about workplace trauma and psychological safety (which sounds parallel to the anti-bullying movement in schools), so I'm excited to think about your request!

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